Hi! I’m currently taking time off from regular posting after having a baby this summer, but want to check in with a little update.
Sweet readers, I’m having a tough time right now.
Whether you’re (1) evacuating your home or have family/friends on the west coast during these devastating wildfires, (2) trying to find normalcy in a very not normal world, and/or (3) adjusting to children learning at home or back in school during this pandemic, this season of life feels very different. It certainly feels different for me. We welcomed our beautiful baby girl this past summer and are absolutely in love with her. From her big curious eyes down to her tiny little toes, she is honestly the sweetest. She’s such an easy baby, but maybe that’s because we have the experience under our belts. Our older daughter just loves her and wants to be around her all the time. We’re so blessed to have our health, home, and happy daughters.
My heart is just so full.
However, at the very same time, a piece of my heart feels like it’s missing.
Our beloved dog, Jude, passed away last month. Jude was diagnosed with cancer in August 2019 and fought it for a year. As pet owners know, pets are a very big part of the family. And Jude? He was my shadow. My sidekick. A true companion in every sense of the word. An irreplaceable part of this family. Wherever I was, he was. If dogs have souls, Jude has one of the biggest. Not only because he was enormous at 120 lbs, he just had a very big heart. He was the kind of dog who could sense how you were feeling. Laid with you while you were sick, sat with you while you cried, smiled at you (seriously!) when you were happy. For 12 beautiful years, Jude was our constant through it all: new homes, new jobs, cookbooks, our wedding, birthdays, book tour, miscarriage, pregnancies, babies, and all the other moments in between.
For anyone who thrives on routine, the loss of such a prominent part of your life feels impossible. Additionally, the transition from 1 to 2 children certainly has its difficulties. Pair all of this with postpartum recovery, postpartum emotions, sleepless newborn nights, and the isolation felt during this world pandemic and your emotional and mental stress feel like a mountain weighing on top of you. My husband, always looking on the bright side, reminds me of the silver linings we have. We’re so thankful our daughter got to meet Jude and that we even have a few pictures of him sitting beside her bassinet. And having activities and gatherings cancelled this summer has encouraged us to slow down. Maybe it’s the same for you too? We’re enjoying more time outdoors and savoring the present. And one last silver lining: While Franklin, our other dog, misses his big buddy, he’s certainly loving all the extra attention. He deserves it.
I mentioned this on social media and want to repeat it here. I know it might seem unseemly to grieve the loss of a dog when so many are losing their lives in the chaos of our world right now. But loss is loss and I’m feeling this one really hard. I recently experienced one of my best days and one of my worst. It’s been an absolute roller coaster of emotions and I’m still trying to work through it all.
I miss him so much. Jude was the happiest dog until those final few days.
I planned to post more recipes during my postpartum time off, but haven’t had the chance to clear my head and publish them all. I promise I’m trying my best to bring you fresh new recipes that I prepped while I was pregnant. Thank you for your patience with me and understanding that I need this time to be with my family.
On a brighter note, it’s Noelle’s 3rd birthday next week! I can’t believe my little girl is turning 3. No big parties this year, but we’re going to make the day as special as we can. She loves the Trolls World Tour movie and I plan to make her a special Queen Poppy cake. I’m terrible with fondant, so I’m thinking vanilla cake, rainbow frosting decoration, and a Trolls cake topper. Have you ever made a Trolls themed birthday cake before? I’m open to ideas!
We took a little vacation to Deep Creek Lake last week. It was a quiet and relaxing family getaway in one of our favorite spots. We just needed a change of scenery. If I’m being honest, sitting on the back deck with coffee and a view was all the medicine we needed. It was after Labor Day, so the lake wasn’t crowded. We lucked out with weather.
‘Tis the season for quick bread. We brought a loaf of the September Sally’s Baking Challenge recipe to the lake with us: cinnamon swirl quick bread. (There have been hundreds of participants so far this month!) This time I mixed 1 cup of chopped and peeled apples into the cinnamon sugar swirl mixture before layering it in. Same bake time. It tasted unbelievable– sort of like last week’s apple cinnamon babka but without a yeasted dough. I highly recommend it.
I was going to wait until the official start of fall, but couldn’t resist. Here’s my first loaf of pumpkin bread this season. I actually prefer it plain without the chocolate chips. I used whole wheat flour in this loaf and topped it with coarse sugar before baking. Same bake time. Always so moist and flavorful.
I want to lead by example not only for my daughters, but for my readers and followers too. In my last coffee break post, I shared my commitment to help break the unjust cycle of racism in our world and country. I hope we each yearn for a more loving and inclusive world and sometimes it’s hard to understand that in order for that to happen, we have to be the change… right now. Over the past couple months, I’ve thought a lot about the privilege I have simply because of the color of my skin. I found this article on Allure.com and while the entire piece is a great resource, the section titled “Reflect on all the ways you benefit from privilege” has been enlightening. (It links to a few more pieces and essays too.) I shared this on my Instagram account, but I joined Rachel Cargle’s eye-opening Do The Work course. It’s a free email course that provides comprehensive and concrete ways for being anti-racist. The emails also include links to articles, other resources, and videos. There is also The Conscious Kid organization. By joining, you have access to many resources for how to teach children (of any age) about anti-racism.
I’m still learning and growing in my own advocacy, but I hope to keep the momentum going that was seen earlier this summer. Racism has deep roots and as we continue to see it in the news every single day, it will not go away without the work.
Have you joined the sourdough bandwagon?
I just picked up a copy of New World Sourdough by Bryan Ford. I’m excited to finally learn more about from-scratch sourdough. I’ve always been intimidated by the entire process because the wealth of information online is overwhelming. However his book and comprehensive guide to sourdough (with FAQs) breaks things down into understandable steps. Super helpful if you’re a beginner like I am.
I also got Whole Grain Sourdough at Home. I haven’t had the chance to dive into it yet, but this book covers how to tackle sourdough using whole wheat flour and ancient grains. Recipes seem very easy to follow too.
I think that’s about it for now. Let’s end this post on a positive note though. No matter what we’re facing in this moment: loss, heartache, exhaustion, injustice, natural disaster, anxiety, change, and anything in between, I know that food can be healing. Baking has always lifted my spirits whether that’s receiving something homemade from a loved one, baking to ease my mind, or baking for someone who needs cheering up. It’s so much more than something sweet, it’s comforting for the mind and soul. Need proof? Last year I wrote a post called What Baking Means to You. The comments are beautiful.
Thank you for being here. xo
I’m so very sorry for your loss of sweet Jude. I fully understand how painful this loss is. As much pain as you, and your family are in right now. I know you will always remember him with joy. He gave you so much. Your angel is running free right now. He knows how much you loved him.
I’m going to make your cinnamon bread with the apples for a small get together this week. Thanks, for all your great recipes.
Sally,
I lost our St. Bernard of 8 years this summer and so your post holds so much meaning for me. I’m sorry to know what you’re going through, but I want you to know you’re not alone. I never knew how devastating losing a pet could be, but it’s astounding, painful and devastating. Every time you think you hear their paws on the floor or see them waiting at the door, it’s just a reminder of the emptiness left behind. Hang in there and be kind to yourself. It does get easier everyday…
And please don’t worry about not posting as many recipes as you planned! I still feel you’re providing plenty of content and I’m happy to have a little time to catch up on old recipes I have yet to try!
Sending love and hugs to you and yours.
My 11 yo daughter, 13 yo son and I have baked and enjoyed your recipes for years. I remember the baby years and the struggle, so know you are not alone. I am also so sorry about Jude; I enjoyed watching him in your blog! But the main purpose of my comment is how proud I am of you for your antiracism work. It is necessary and important and you are example for so many on this! I am even more thrilled to bake your recipes and support your work!
Thank you for being a constant source of inspiration. I am sorry for your loss. Our fur kids hold a special place in our hearts. Congratulations on your two beautiful children! It’s interesting to navigate endings and beginnings simultaneously. Living with an open heart takes great strength, and you appear to be embracing the fullness of the human experience. Not only are your recipes always the best, but you’re also one of the most genuine and kind bloggers I follow. I love these coffee break posts. Please take great care of yourself and your loved ones. While I love new recipes, I am happy to go to the archives while you regain your footing. When your well is full, we’ll still be here.
Sally, I am so sorry on the loss of your beloved Jude. I understand your pain, having been through this sorrow many times myself. I have found that you have to be strong for the rest of your family and try to carry on. Being grateful for the good things in your life really helps and I know that you are. Take care and take a deep breath and let peace come into your heart. Sending love and prayers….
So sorry to hear about your family losing your wonderful dog, Jude. And going from one child to two is a huge change, for sure. Lack of sleep is so hard when you have a new baby in the house. My advice is be kind to yourself. Give yourself time to heal from the loss you are feeling. The fog you have to walk through for now makes it tough, but it will get better. I promise. Congratulations on your new baby girl and enjoy your wonderful family! Your food blog is my favorite of all I subscribe to! Your attention to detail is the best!!! Thank you for being you!
Oh Sally. I am so sorry about Jude. I know the deep pain of the loss of a pet. We lost our family’s sweet Winston to cancer over Father’s Day. There are definitely days where the grief is overwhelming. One thing I’ve learned is to take time to feel your feelings. Acknowledge them for what they are, and allow yourself to feel it all. It really helps.
Blessings to your family!
I’m so very sorry for the loss of your companion Jude. It’s agony. May God comfort you and give you peace.
Sally, your daughters are beyond beautiful!! Mine are long grown and how I miss those exhausting but precious times. But I too, have experienced the devastating loss of beloved pets. I’m praying that time’s blessed magic will heal your heart.
So sorry for your loss…. my dog is my everything and I can’t imagine loosing him. Sending love your way!
Thank you so much for sharing with us both the struggles and the blessings that you are going through during this difficult time. A time where both congratulations on sweet baby Elise and I’m so sorry for your precious Jude are both reactions to be said. I lost my sweet Peanut last month as well after nine and half wonderful years and you couldn’t have said it better. Some days are ok and other days are the hardest thing to get through. Pets are truly one of the family, they bring us laughter and joy and try to teach us how to be the best person we can be. I’m sending you and your family all of the positive thoughts as you continue to grow and heal with one another.
Love always, xoxo.
“The hardest part about losing a pet you love is not when you say goodbye…it’s the way your whole world changes without them and the emptiness that’s left in your heart.”
Dear sally
I have grieved first loss of my pets each and everytime. I understand exactly how you feel.
Just keep him in your heart always
Remember the good times
How he made you smile
He crossed the rainbow bridge where he can be happy and continue to play and watch over you and your family
Your baby girl is beautiful
Maybe you will welcome another dog in your home to keep Franklin from missing his buddy
I had a dog who grieved the loss of her buddy
Watch Franklin please
Give him lots love and attention
He too will grieve
My heart ♥️ grieves with you.
Be well
Make a photo collage of Jude and your family
That’s what we have done
Take care
Be well
Amy
Sally, reading your post, my tears are flowing. You have the most honest heart and
soul. To share such emotions and love with so many makes you a very precious and
special woman. I am so very sorry about the loss of your beloved Jude. We lost our
special kitty 8 years ago and still miss him everyday, the hole they leave in your heart
and your life is huge and you grieve for them for a long time. Keep all the happy times
that you shared with Jude close in your heart and he will somehow help you to move
forward. Their souls are always close by, like little guardian angels.
On a happier note, congratulations to you and family for your new little angel.
She is so darling and will make your life even happier than before with her sweet
smiles. Stay strong, this life is challenging.
May the Lord Bless you and your beautiful family each and everyday and may Jude’s
memories and his sweet soul bring smiles to your face and help you through these
coming days.
Sally, thinking of you and your family during this very difficult time! I’m so very sorry for your loss! The world sure feels upside down right now but that doesn’t mean that life moments stop, whether good or bad. You certainly are not alone in all those emotions and the roller coaster of feelings. Congratulations on your sweet new baby girl! I’m glad you’re taking the time to be with your family and focus on the positive things. My daughter just turned 3 and we’re expecting another baby in late October and I feel like I can definitely relate to this post. Thanks for another great coffee break and for being so open! XO
I’m so sorry for the loss of your sweet pup. I didn’t know it could hurt so much until we lost our pup a few years ago. Some people will never understand the missing piece you can’t get back. I tear up right now even thinking about him. It doesn’t get easier but it hurts less. Soon you’ll be able to remember all the good times with Jude without feeling the sting of the loss. Praying that is soon.
Your story has really touched my heart. I have loved your posts and am still trying to make myself get the ambition to bake everything you post. I love baking and cooking but cannot get myself motivated to get going. I also have had a few years of unrest and am trying to work through it. In 2015 my husband was diagnosed with cancer and his surgery ended up with him in a coma for a month. A couple of months later our beloved Rufus , diagnosed with lung issues and passed away 4 months later at 12 years old. My husband never got over the loss and in 2018 the cancer was back and he passed away. Now our 2nd love Dooley who is 14years old is having hearing issues and I am afraid for him. I know how this note sounds but I have always felt that I need to hold myself together so as not to upset my children and grandchildren. I know this will all pass and some day I will be back to dealing with events better but for now I enjoy baking and cooking for others so that is my security blanket. Thank you for all the wonderful recipes and stories as I have enjoyed them so much. Now I just have to get the urge to get going and do some baking. Thank you and congratulations on the birth of your lovely Elise.
Good morning Sally. Take all the time you need to rejuvenate your body and soul. These times are not easy on any of us. But watching your videos and baking your delicious recipes helps us get through the days and sharing our creations with family and friends warms our hearts and theirs. So sorry for the loss of your faithful fur family member, it’s never easy to say goodbye to those we love. Be thankful for the beautiful family you have. May God bless you. Always.
I am so sorry for the loss of your loyal companion. Dogs are family and when they go up the Rainbow Road the pain of loss is felt so much. He is free of pain and will always remain in your heart.
Congratulations to you for the beautiful baby. The big sister is obviously smitten with the new member of the family. The best to you and a virtual hug. I love your website and have shared it with all of friends and family.
You have my deepest sympathies on the loss of your beloved companion, Jude. I have experience the same kind of loss; losing my shadow companion and I don’t know if you ever get over it totally. We never forget them because they always live on in our hearts and our wonderful memories. There is great risk in loving our fur babies, because they are with us for such a short time but the rewards outweigh the risks. Take care.
Oh, Sally! I am so, so, so sorry! My heart broke when I read this. I didn’t know Jude, but I loved reading about him and he seemed like such a wonderful dog. I definitely understand how you feel–our dogs are a part of the family, and losing them is a terrible blow. So don’t feel bad for mourning your sweet Jude, Sally! He certainly deserves it. *cries* Praying for you and your family♡
Hi Sally,
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy! I haven’t had biological children of my own so I can’t even imagine what you are going through there with all of the emotion that comes with having a new baby.
I have had two loving and loyal yellow Labrador retrievers that were by my side for almost 14 years. You’re so right. They were members of our family. The loss of our dogs in 2016 (six months apart) broke my heart more than I could have imagined. I had a harder time losing them than I did with some of my “people”. I think it’s as you said: They bring us so much joy during all of our good times and comfort us during the bad ones, except for when they leave us and that’s when I felt like I needed them most. They take pieces of our hearts with them when they go and what they give us is the love they leave behind.
I wish you so much joy in the days ahead. I, too have a positive minded husband who helps me get through the tough times and brings me joy during good ones. It’s such a weird world right now with the pandemic, politics and climate crises all going on at once. Our skies are filled with smoke right now and yesterday, it was so thick we could barely see the sun so my husband and I got busy in our kitchen and it was the best distraction from the outside world. He cooks. I bake. We ended up with quiche, practising for a milestone family birthday lunch we’re hosting this month.
Baking gets me through a lot, too. About two and a half years ago, I started making sourdough bread. I had no idea how much I would fall in love with the process. It’s a wonderful baking addiction! Enjoy. Keep it simple. My advice is to stick with one instructor and one method until you get the hang of it and I think you’ll find it a lot less overwhelming. There is no one “right way” to make sourdough. That’s the beauty and sometimes the challenge of “artisan” bread. Knowing you from your blog and wonderful recipes, you’ll likely be coming up with your own formulas and methods in the future!
All the best, Michelle
Dearest Sally,
I know the loss of a pet. It is the hardest thing to go through. May your family be your comfort. Your new little addition is adorable!! Many blessings to her. I have been keeping busy with all of your recipes!! I have made things I never even thought of!! I just want to say thank you….you have kept me busy and my family “full”. Looking forward to more!!
Sally, thank you for sharing your heart. Congrats on your baby daughter. Shes as adorable as your other! So sorry for your loss of your beloved dog. I, too, lost my beloved dog in July and everyday I miss him so much. He was my buddy, my sidekick, always with me. He was with our family 14 years. We got him when our kids were in first grade and through college. I look for him everyday and then I remember. Our home feels empty without him. I feel your pain and I send a virtual hug. Thank you for your presence on social media. I am not a baker but through this pandemic I have learned to bake things I never thought I could! I’ve made your recipes and my family is so happy . Thanks for your great recipes. Enjoying learning new things and you have made that easier! Congrats again! I hope the days get easier with you missing your dog.
This was a very honest and real post Sally. My heart goes out to you for losing your fur baby! I’m glad you have a new little one to brighten up your days in these trying times. As always, you are my favorite blog and baking inspiration.
Oh, Sally, so sorry to hear about Jude. What a faithful companion through all those seasons of your life! It’s so tough to lose someone you love, and pets are definitely family! Thanks for sharing your heart and being honest that it’s a tough time for you. It’s been tough for everyone and it helps to hear you’re not alone. Take the time you need to rest and heal. Don’t worry if all those recipes you planned don’t get published when you wanted. Family and taking time for yourself is much more important and we’ll all be here and ready to bake whenever you have the energy to get to them. Enjoy all the snuggles from your sweet girls!
Sally, I’m so sad for your loss of Jude and I fully understand how hard it is even though you have so many other blessings. We lost our 13-year-old Cavalier 7 years ago and I grieved for him for so long. God brought us another sweet Cavalier who has helped heal the loss. I’m praying for you!
Love you, Sally- thanks for your honesty. My heart is happy and breaking for you. Dulce is such a HUGE part of my world- she’s half of my Instagram for goodness sake- and I do not want to picture this world without her. Your grief is your own- do not apologize for it ever. All of your loyal followers are here and sending you healing light- please stay strong. Elise is absolutely beautiful, just like her mama! She came into your life at the perfect time- everything happens for a reason and when it’s supposed to. Stay strong mama. XO- Angela (Dulce_and_Desserts)
I am so very sorry for your loss. Our pets are our family members and when we lose a pet, it is devastating. It leaves us feeling so sad and lost. It leaves a hole in our hearts forever. We need time to grieve the loss of our pet. I’m keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Congratulations on the birth of your daughter. Such wonderful news. I’m glad you all had a chance to get away for Labor Day. Sometimes a change in scenery is just what a person needs. Especially right now. Thanks for all of your wonderful recipes and keeping us posted on how you are doing. Again, my deepest condolences on your loss.
Thanks, Sally, for your willingness to share what you are experiencing during these days that are dark for so many individuals, families and communities. With our two daughters grown and gone, our grandchildren already in college and retirement allowing us to stay in and safe, we suffer only the isolation. We know how very lucky we are.
I want you to know, and I hope you take pleasure in knowing, what you do for others with this amazing blog. My sister, older than I by nine years and my role model for 70+ years, passed away recently and I was privileged to spend her last five weeks in her home with her. Until the last week when she stopped eating entirely, she had a slice of your blueberry muffin bread every morning, and sometimes with afternoon tea as well. It was a special part of each day — she loved it, and I loved baking it for her. It will forever have a prominent place in my memory of that precious time.
We’ve just returned from a long road trip to visit my 95 year old mother-in-law. I carried two loaf pans with me just in case I found myself in an ill-equipped kitchen along the way. That bread was my “hostess gift” everywhere I went and I am still getting notes from friends who love it. Think of yourself as Johnny Appleseed leaving a trail of pleasure and recipes all across the Northern Plains.
This is to say, take the time you need to ease into your new life — we’re out here loving you, baking away and grateful for all you have given us. We’ll still be here when you get to a new routine and new energy and we especially want you to get the sleep you need to care for those darling girls!
Today, home at last, I will take up the cinnamon swirl bread. I love the idea of adding apples so will do that, for sure. And then I’ll be looking up Rachel Cargle’s course — thanks for that, too.
Love to you and to Melissa awaiting her twins! Wow! Send for help when you need it Melissa. Big Sky Montana beckons.
We are sending many warm thoughts to you and your family on the loss of Jude. We unexpectedly and suddenly lost our almost 11 year old dog last year, so I still remember the pain of grieving him, and there are days I still do even now. Enjoy your beautiful girls and give Franklin lots of extra cuddles. Hugs to you.
So sorry to hear about Jude. Our fur babies definitely have a piece of our heart and are a special part of our families, each with their own personalities! Praying for you all during this very difficult season of life. On the positive side, congratulations on the newest addition to your family! She is beautiful! May God bless you and your family!